


the only thing i have to give is...

by Lord_Maple



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Alternate Universe - Kindergarten & Pre-school, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Bittersweet Ending, Childhood, Gen, Mild Hurt/Comfort, no beta we die like Glenn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-21
Updated: 2020-10-21
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:09:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27127699
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lord_Maple/pseuds/Lord_Maple
Summary: Six-year-old Dimitri tries to write a story.Modern AU ft. smolmitri
Relationships: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd & Lambert Egitte Blaiddyd
Comments: 1
Kudos: 24





	the only thing i have to give is...

When Mr. Eisner was telling the class about writing, little Dimitri was in his own little world.

“Dad said he was coming home today!” he thought. His right foot thumps on the floor over and over, a bit too excited at the thought, much to the annoyance of Little El-- everyone was sitting together, criss-cross applesauce-- she can’t focus on Mr. Eisner’s words with all that tapping!

When his sister (“His big sister!” she would say. “I’m older, you know!”) grasped his ankle to still itself, little Dima snapped out of his dream. Dad will get angry if Mr. Eisner told him if he was making too much noise, right? And if Dad gets angry with me, he might not want to see me again! Dimitri childishly held his breath unnecessarily in some kind of attempt to limit the amount of noise he makes. 

Fortunately, it didn’t take long for their kind teacher to get into the class’s assignment for the day.

“Okay, class. We’re going to pass your notebooks around once you get to your seats. All of the sharpies are already on your desks, so don’t forget to write your name on it!”

The class all said “yes, sir” at the same time and did just that. Little Dima was already thinking about what to write in his notebook. Mr. Eisner said the first thing to do is plan it, right? Plan, draft, revise, edit, and publish… yeah, that’s what he said! Dima smiles to himself. He wasn’t paying attention like he was supposed to, but he still remembered! That means Dad won’t have to hear about him being a bad student.

Ingrid was Class Helper today, so she went around the tables passing out the black and white notebooks. When Dimitri got his own at last, she went ahead and sat across from him, right where her assigned seat was. Ingrid was a very good friend of his. She, Sylvain, and Felix always played with each other in recess-- whether it be Tag or Hide-and-Seek or the like. She’s very good at the first one-- no one can seem to outrun her when she’s “it”! Oh, but she’s bad at hiding. Sometimes, she can’t find a hiding spot in time so “it” would just see her standing around when time’s up! Sylvain would laugh because Sylvain can be mean at times.

“Dima? Aren’t you going to write your name down?”

“O-Oh, I’m sorry.” Dimitri’s face flushed. His mind just seems to wander a lot today! He takes out a black sharpie from the bin at the center of the table and writes his name on the cover of the book. Everyone’s book looks the same-- a weird, swirly mix of black and white. Dimitri has seen more colorful books in the supermarket once and wishes he had one of those instead. Like the one that’s blue and had little lions on it! He loves lions a lot, so Dad bought a big lion stuffy for his birthday last year! It was so big and fluffy, all of his friends slept on it when there was a sleepover at his house! Felix said he was jealous-- that he wished that his dad would buy one for him to match with his best friend, but Mr. Rodrigue just laughed and said, “Maybe next year,” when he overheard his son.

Should he write about that? But that isn’t interesting enough for a story, right? Books are big and long, so what’s something that’s big and long enough to write about?

When Dimitri looked at Ingrid, it looked like she’s already writing.

“Hey, Ingrid.”

“Hmm? What is it, Dima?”

“What are you going to write about?”

“Oh, uh. I think I’m going to write about our trip last summer-- the one at Deirdru.”

Dimitri remembered that. Since all of their parents are friends, they all went together on vacation to Deirdru, and it was a lot of fun there! He and Felix made the best sandcastle ever on the beach and the adults looked so proud and happy… including Dad! Even Glenn was smiling and Glenn is what Sylvain called a “party pooper” so it meant a lot to Felix. So much so, Felix started crying and then Dimitri starting crying because his best friend is crying and--

Oh, but. If Ingrid is writing that, then Dimitri can’t, right? Mr. Eisner said it’s bad to copy other people’s work and used a big word… “plagiarism”. Plagiarism is bad because plagiarism is cheating! Dimitri doesn’t want to cheat because Dad will be angry with him if he does something bad like that!

But what should he write? Dimitri looks up and sees Felix and Sylvain sitting next to each other at another table. They’re already writing, too! Why can’t Dimitri think of anything? Maybe he could write about another trip they took? But what if they are writing that? Dimitri feels a little fuzzy and tired… writing is hard! His foot starts thumping on the floor again. No one notices this time because his classmates are talking as they write.

Maybe, maybe, maybe… how about something where they aren’t there? Like something he and El did? But that just goes back to the same thing, but with El instead…. Oh, of course, something with just him and his dad! Dad isn’t in kindergarten like him, so he can write whatever he wants without worry!

Is there anything interesting to write about with just him and Dad, though?

Now that Dimitri thinks about it, even though he lives with his dad-- and only him, only fun things happen when his friends or El are around. On normal days, Dad would always come back late and tired. Sometimes he’s mad and angry and loud-- oh, but not at little Dima. He always smiles when he thinks Dimitri is watching, but sometimes… sometimes little Dimitri hears noises from his room, and when he peeks out of the door, Dad is either yelling or crying about something he doesn’t understand. Dimitri finds it hard to approach Dad when he’s like that, so he tries to be extra good the next day! He seemed so happy when Dimitri drew him at school once-- the picture is still on the fridge.

Maybe, he could write about that? Then he could show it to Dad when he’s done!

...

Dimitri shook his head. He doesn’t want to write sad things. Sad things make him sad.

But even if Dimitri doesn’t write it, he still thinks about it. He remembers back when he had a mom, who was also El’s mom, but she left one day. Dima only remembered a little bit about her-- long brown hair, kind face, and is very good at sewing. Dad cried a lot when he told Dima that she was gone. El was sad too because, after that, she stopped living with Dima and had to move in with her other dad. No one wanted to tell Dima what happened and El didn’t know either. Dad couldn’t get the words outright, but he did say that Dima shouldn’t worry about it. “Adult problems,” he said. Dimitri didn’t want to make Dad sadder or more tired, so instead, he just wished that he’d grow older faster so that he could understand. If he’s an adult, he would know more things, and if he knows more things, he can do more for Dad, right? That’s why he drank more milk these days-- they say that milk is good for bones and good bones mean it’ll grow faster and if it grows faster then he’ll get taller like all the other grown-ups… right?

It makes Dima a little angry that he hasn’t gotten taller since.

“How are you doing, Dimitri?”

The boy turns around and sees that his teacher is behind him.

“Do you need help?”

“Um… I… I don’t know what to write.”

“Do you have any idea about what you want to write?”

“Uh, just… something I think my dad will like. I want to show it to him later.”

Mr. Eisner smiles. “That’s very sweet of you, Dimitri. How about something fun you did with him?”

Dimitri shook his head. “I want… to write something else.”

“Hmm.” Mr. Eisner looks up to the window in thought. “Then, how about this. Think about what you like to write-- your favorite books and whatnot.”

“What I like?”

Mr. Eisner nodded. “If you like it, then wouldn’t your dad like to read it? Something that you love, that is.”

Little Dimitri didn’t think of that! Of course, it was Dad who gave him his favorite books-- the tales of Loog and his knights are always exciting!

Then, a story about his dad being a hero like Loog would make him happy, right?

“I like Loog, so… can I write something like that?”

“Yes, Dimitri, you can.”

After Dimitri gave his thanks, Mr. Eisner pats Dimitri in the back and moves on to check on the other students. A story where Dad is the hero… wouldn’t that be a wonderful thing to read!

Dimitri closed his eyes and tried to imagine what that would look like. Dad wearing Loog’s shiny armor, beating up bad guys with a cool lance-- oh, his horse would also be very pretty, happy, healthy, and friendly. Then maybe, Rodrigue would be there. Of course, they are best friends, so they would be together on their quest to defeat evil! When everything seemed dark, just like Loog, he’ll save a beautiful princess, fall in love and they’ll stay together forever--

Forever?

Dimitri opened his eyes. Would Dad really like a story like that?

Okay, but what about himself? If he ever gets in trouble, Dad would save him because Dad is his hero! He works hard for him every day and does so much for him-- cook meals, give gifts, take him on trips-- everything! Dad does everything for him so, when Dad finally saves him from the evil monster, Dimitri will--

Dimitri will what?

He’ll grow up and understand “adult things” eventually, sure, but what about now? What would Dad want to hear from his son after he saved him?

With a pencil in hand, Dimitri finally wrote down his first few words. “I love you.” He wants Dad to know that.  
…

Is that it?

Dima’s throat felt dry. What happened to all of his ideas earlier? He wrote it again on the next line, in some attempt to make sense of his feelings in physical form. “I love you.” Oh, but, he’s already skipping a step. Plan, draft, revise, edit, publish… how could he already forget that? He was planning earlier, but he didn’t write any of his thoughts down… what his beginning, middle, and end are supposed to be-- all circled in little bubbles. Would Mr. Eisner get angry if he doesn’t do that? And what if Dad hears that he didn’t follow instructions?

All he knows is that above all, what he wants is…. As if the notebooks, the desk, and the world were to disappear, Dimitri’s hands shake as he tries to glide his pencil across the air to get something done-- something that he’ll be happy enough with. Something that will get Dad to never cry again.

When the bell rang to signal lunchtime, Dimitri didn’t get up from his seat.

“Dimitri, it’s lunchtime. Everyone turned in their notebooks, so--” The teacher paused when he saw tears streaming down the young boy’s cheeks.

“Dimitri? What’s wrong?”

“...It’s all I have.”

“All… you have?”

When Byleth Eisner looked down at the page Dimitri was writing in, all that was on it was a drawing of two smiling stick figures, and the words “I love you” repeated over and over until it filled the rest of the page.

No words were running through Dimitri’s head anymore-- just blurry vision and the sinking feeling in his gut that he failed his father in the most important way. 


End file.
